Stories

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Welcome to Our Wave.

On this page are stories shared by survivors that highlight hope but can also be hard to read. A grounding activity can help you to feel calm and make it easier to read these stories. Do you want to try one of our grounding activities?

Name

Most of the time I feel like I have overcome his touch. But sometimes, I still feel the warmth of his embrace. Apparently “all boys aren’t the same” so I get close and touchy with them, tease them, and sometimes even kiss them. I think I do it on purpose. I try to convince myself that I'm over it, I'm over the fact that I've been marked by the wrong person. I'm over the fact that I can’t be alone in public. I'm scared. No, not scared, terrified. I'm afraid of loving another without knowing their intention. I’m terrified that someone is about t...

Just typical men behaviour...

Art has had an incredible healing effect for me, allowing me to express pain or hanger.

I'm searching for other survivors who were targeted/groomed by Name.

I hope we can find healing together. And be empowered.

Name

I feel getting justice for what happened to me would help the healing.

Name

I remember so clearly thinking my suffering would never end. That I would feel the pain forever.
Each feeling is temporary. Life comes in waves. The pain doesn’t disappear, instead it becomes easy to hold. You grow around it and watch as it changes from a raging forest fire to small embers. You are worthy of love. You are enough. You are not alone.

Trying to find who I truly am

I don't like to let this define me, I went on and married the love of my life, I have had kids and I love my family dearly. I worked and bought a house and on the outside I am normal. I am ok having two personas because for me I need to because he took enough from me that I won't let him take any more than he did.

#507

Healing for me I think means truly believing I have value as just a human being, that I don't have to do anything to earn being treated with respect and that it really is okay to say no.

3 experiences and an boring but good escape

I believe you.

#505

This is going to sound cliche but it does get better. You have people around you who will love and support you no matter what. This experience that gas happened to you does not make you broken or dirty. You have so much more to offer this world. If you can't live for yourself live out of spite to see your abuser die or get what they deserve.

Canadian Province

A man named name didn't take my no on a date. He pushed himself on me and did things to me I didn't want. I was so in shock because I had known him for years and always felt safe with him. I ended up seeing him a second time because I thought somehow I misunderstood or exaggerated the incident in my mind. The second time only served to prove it was exactly what I thought it was.

2 new updates

Friday, 13

On the morning of Friday 13, [My best friend/his wife] asked if I'd come over to watch [child] that night so I did. She went to bed around 4 PM and it was just him, [child], and I there besides her at the time. [Their roommate couple] was at work and [couples baby] was at his grandmother's. We got Plateful for dinner at around 5:30 PM, per my request for Chinese when he asked what I wanted for dinner. On the way back from picking up the food, he started asking a very personal question. He asked "how long has it been since you were eaten ou...

#501

My story is quite small in comparison to others but I want other people who feel their story isn’t serious enough to know they can have feeling about it. It can still hurt to have someone take advantage of you in any way and they deserve to heal

coming to terms with having a history of child sexual abuse as a young man

I am full of hope. I always feel like my core is in a good place, that deep down I am happy and safe and loved. This gives me hope that whatever it is I am going through right now is temporary and a part of my life's path.

#499

I didn’t know other people experienced the same thing until today. This may have been the most healing thing to ever happen to me to know that I’m not completely alone.

#498

Relationships aren't worth it, once you get the person of your dreams it doesn't actually mean they can make you happy. They might just steal your happiness away.

#496

if you need the reminder, you deserve to have a good life. your abuse and trauma did not make you into something who only deserves pain. please treat yourself kindly, even if it is not an act of healing. treating yourself well is an act of rebellion to your abuser. rebel, and live how you truly deserve <3

Survivor Spaces Community

1 new update

#480

Healing is so many things... accepting what happened, sitting with how I feel, reading other's stories, telling trusted people what happened, writing, drawing, walking...

Trauma is trauma

You matter and your feelings are valid!

My First Year at College

You are not alone.

hopeful for a fresh start

i haven't even started my own journey yet. if I were to give advice, it would be to be patient with yourself and don't push yourself to admit things that you're not ready to. it took me many months of talking it thru with my therapist and ongoing discussions to even utter the words "abuse". and even longer to fathom that I had been thru sexual trauma.

1 new update

The Brutal Truth Most Forget…

Tears fall from my face when I have flashbacks. The amount of times I’ve ran to the washroom and cried remembering those nights. Frozen in fear, unable to move. Feeling his hands on my skin. And hearing his voice as he tries to make sure I’m not awake. The excuses I’ve heard and the disbelief I’ve been through, that I still go through. Most dont believe my story, they believe his because “how could he do that?” They act like he never added the second part of his side; he admitted to touching me without consent. People don’t realize that...

#489

Since I was two, my parents have been divorced. I would see my dad on the weekends, and that meant going to my great aunt’s house where my dad’s cousin and her children lived. My aunt’s (my dad’s cousin) husband died and left her with her three kids. I would spend time with all three of them, playing and having fun while I could for the weekend. But I was closest to my oldest cousin, who was a girl. She was- and still is- three years older than me. I would follow her everywhere and look up to her as a role model. I used to think she was so pre...

#490

I needed to move on from my abuser and find a way forward. I didn’t want him to take anymore from me than he already had. My dream grad school had become a last resort knowing I would still see him everyday and continue to have to relive the worst moments of my life. I had to move away from everyone and my prior dreams for a fresh start.

#491

You are not your story. Yes, this happened to you, but you are so much more. You are strong. You are brave. You are a survivor.

You Are Not Alone

Hope, for me, is knowing I'm not alone. It's knowing that the abuse hides in the dark and that the more of us who speak up shines a light on it. Hope is knowing you're reading this. Hope is helping someone else know there's hope.

#486

I was 19 years old and a sophomore in college. I had never had sex. I was naiive. I met a senior boy on a dating app during finals week and told him I didn't want to have sex, but eventually agreed to a make-out session. He immediately pressured me into doing more. I gave him a blowjob to try to appease him, but he wouldn't stop, even when I said I was a virgin and wasn't ready. I said no many times. He said he'd use a condom but didn't. When I kept saying it hurt, he said, "You just have to let it happen." When I left, he asked me if I had a...

Unwanted and Non-Consensual Intimate Experiences in Medical Settings

Healing means validation. And part of validation is accountability for those who caused the harm.

My story

It is hard. I am only 20 and I wake up from nightmares of my abuser. It has taken me almost 6 years to be able to let a grown man give me a hug without flinching. But it does happen, and it does get easier. Living in fear is not the way to live your life. You also have to forgive. Staying angry at your abuser hurts you more than it will ever hurt them.

Unapologetically Surviving Community

I was only 16.

Healing for me is finding myself. And not letting guys take me for granted. I have learned to have respect for myself, and not let guys just use me for sex. It’s hard being young in this generation, because that all they want. Therapy, self-care, gym and family and my bff are the only things that are keeping me moving.

#481

Time helps. It doesn’t make you feel less scared or have those flashbacks but it dulls the pain.

#479

I was drunk. So drunk. He came over and saw how I could barely walk up the stairs and how I was slurring my words. I threw up in my bathroom and met him in my room, where I asked him to start hooking up. I will always regret that. I had one memory from that entire experience when our bodies were touching naked, and my hand was a buffer between our genitals. I never said no. I never asked to stop. I don't remember anything else. I also threw up afterward, and I only know so from a friend's recording. I didn't realize why I felt so dirty, guilty...

YOU ARE NOT ALONE

YOU CAN CONTROL WHO YOU ARE, YOUR LIFE, AND THE WAY YOUR FUTURE UNFOLDS. YOU CAN NOT CONTROL OTHER PEOPLE'S ACTIONS OR DECISIONS. NO MATTER WHAT KEEP WORKING ON YOURSELF. MY PERSONAL MANTRA: RETRAIN.REBUILD.REVIVE

Chapter 1.

You are not alone. You are worthy. You will survive. You will heal. You will find your peace.
It is not your fault.

Now At 23 (I survived)

God got you out the situation and loves you. Don’t blame yourself for what happened or the action of others. Remember God and karma never sleeps. The people who have wronged you got their bad karma or will get it. You’re good karma is still going. You still deserve the best and can take back the power and energy that was taken from you. It’s okay to cry and let it out. It’s okay to tell someone it’s okay to keep it to yourself. It’s okay to act as if it never happened. It’s okay to forget about everything. Soon it won’t hurt like it used to ....

Survivor

Finding happiness in yourself and your own family, knowing you did nothing wrong and you have nothing to be guilty of

1 new update

I was Just a Kid, and So Was He

Don’t blame yourself for things you couldn’t control. Don’t blame yourself for another harm against you. It wasn’t your fault. You are stronger then what they made you feel that day.

I was sexually abused by my best friend when we were 10 years old.

I (24,m) was sexual abused by my best friend at the time we were 10 years old.
I was in 3rd grade and had to repeat that grade, so i lost a lot of contact to my friends. I stayed in contact with one friend, the perpetrator, and our friendship grew a lot.

#471

First of all, I'm so grateful for the good work you all do, and to be a part of the Me Too movement. Thank you so much!
I have found the healing work from sexual assault (s) is tricky stuff, very tricky. The Me Too movement has certainly made progress in many areas providing platforms for women to do both personal healing and social justice work. Sadly, all that doesn't simply undo what's been internalized as we grow up and even as grownups.

I was 14.

It wasn’t your fault. You are loved.

Unapologetically Surviving Community

#467

he wouldn’t listen to me when i told him i didn’t want to go to his room. i told him i was too drunk and i didn’t feel well, that i wanted to go back to my room. he took me with him anyway. he stuck his hand in my pants and i told him to stop. he did for a moment, then he tried again. i told him no again, and he did stop. we went to bed. i wish he had done more, because now i’m traumatized and having panic attacks but don’t feel like i should be, because he stopped. i feel even worse for wishing he hadn’t. because then my feelings would be val...

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